Cameron Santoro
Blog Post#1
24 September 2013
Escape From Afghanistan Metaphors
Metaphors are important to the writing process. Many times if an author needs to paint a picture in our minds, the will use metaphors. In Escape from Afghanistan by Farah Ahmedi, she uses metaphors to paint a picture of what Afghanistan looks like and what the people and area feel like( the only thing I knew about this place was that Osama lived in caves there). Ahmedi uses metaphor to describe a bus trip along a windy road near a river a” if someone laid a long ribbon along a zigzag path on the bank of the river.” By using this the author has given me a better understanding of what these experiences were like and that keeps me interested in the story.
Another thing that kept me interested in the story was examining the difficulty Ahmedi had in leaving Afghanistan. She was trying to leave a country run by the Taliban, who would kill someone for listening to music. In addition to all of these things she had to literally scale mountains with her asthmatic mother. All of these things made me appreciate my freedom even more and made me take things in perspective. If this person could do all this then the very least I can do is help my mom with groceries, help my little brother get ready for school, or at the very least try harder on my homework.
You did a good job of taking on the focus from class and converting it into a post. In order to improve your writing, the next step is for you to explain in more detail. You say, "By using this the author has given me a better understanding of what these experiences were like and that keeps me interested in the story," but you don't explain what that better understanding is. That's what I want to see moving forward: Your idea, evidence from the story to support that idea, and a thorough explanation of how the evidence supports your idea. Also, please do me a favor and make the text easier to read.
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